Undelivered Letter, actually it was not posted.

It was my intermediate days. I am almost hanging with the friends other than my tenth mates in bus. There was no old rum in that bottle. A new friends came in life and we are on our own way to mingle.

The best part I like in my intermediate is I used to go in the small bus called as Maxi Cab. That specially covers the very small villages and gathers of all such persons in this small bus. we can count the members in a bus. I remember it is 16 members capacity, out of which I used to hang up all the guys, I am very far apart from the gals.

It is a normal day. We are waiting for the cab. Every day it should be in the campus before last bell. But it never on time. And I liked that. It has been another 15 min. Actually I was late from the college. When I reached the college end gate, an old memories stuck in the air. Sulthana and Priya, were in the bus. I don't know the reason why they were in the bus.  But I am happy seeing them. Actually I was excited for two things. Today the new maxi cab take the place of old one due to some engine problem. And the new cab fills with the old friends is the super excited one.

I hanged up with the cab mates for the some time and reached old friends. we conversed for some time. I didn't remember the conversations. But in some where of the part of the conversation, there is a discussion about a Letter, sent by Koppaka/Sulthana to Madhu or vice-versa. Really, I didn't remember. But finally I have the address of Madhu in my hand.

I determined to write a post(letter) once in my life time. Actually my sister was inspiration for that. And I read in some papers the friendship bonding's in letters. I tried to start a letter on one fine day to Madhu. It completed successfully. I scribbled normal conversation, as it is a first letter.

But still I donno the reason why I haven't posted that letter to Madhu. But it is a good memory to share now. This is my gift for her birthday.

"HAPPY BIRTH DAY MADHURI".

Sri Rama Navami

It's one of my favorite holy-day in the list. It is not because of its divine, but on this day, we all the family members meet in our grandi' town. Every year, its our mundane, to gather at "Moturu".

We gather at the place by early morning. Neatly dressed after the head bath's. We all will ready by before noon. Actually we have plenty of time before the Seetha Raman Kalyanam starts in the temple. There is one custom in our home town that after the Talambrahalu session has completed in the Bhadrachalam, we need to start the kalyanam in temple of the Moturu. It is after the famous temple Bhadrachalam, usually called as "Apara Bhadradri".

The town is so devoted to the Lord Sri Rama. Every year has adding new colors to the occasion. The Kalyanam starts at the noon and lasts for at least 3 hours.

We, kids, usually completes our darshanam and return to the Home by Lunch time. The elder one of the kids will serve first the other people and finally we serves them back. Actually in our family, girls are the elder ones. we survived. hehehe. Just kidding. Anyway, we love each other.

It is the best part of this day now. The only day, we, kids, ask our parents for money with a little pride. We will collect the amount to spend on that day. As it is a giant family, we have a good collection. I think, we got around 150 per head at that time. We handed all over the money to the elder kid and they lead us to the "Theertham", it is a market where playing items sold.

We have some set of items we usually go every year.... like Rangula Ratnam(giant wheel), Ice-creams, Shooting and finally our common gift to present to our grandi. We often spend little on the toys. But we never missed out the gift to our grandi.

Finally we close our day by handing the gift. Later we packed to move our ways back.

But we grown up and moved to different places. Still, I love to go there on this day, wherever I am, as I little blessed than other. Any way, I hope those days will come back again.

Dear cousin's, I want to meet to you soon and I need your love to pour on me.  
    

It's End...

I have enough memories to share with you all. I have successfully shared my love/care/friendship/my doubts/my feelings about you(school mates) in these (old) posts. Hope it never hurt anybody. If it so, I am sorry.

Truly speaking, I was never lucky to extent my deep friendship with you while our schooling. Basically, my life has designed like that. But after 6 years, He only given a chance to replenish my best relations with get2gather party. At least some of them me know as a good friend. Hehehehe.

At last, an ordinary friend gained some place in your hearts. Hope you people gave a good room for me. Hmmm.. My only wish is, just I wanna be with you forever. Never hesitate to call me and share the experiences. I am always welcome to pick your call. Appreciate for the mails or messages.

I would like to continue these relations for the coming days. See how idiotic/sentimental I am.

Now you may have a doubt, why this guy saying good bye messages now. Since from so many days I have been struggling whether I need to move further. But life is like we need to take on what we have.Coming to the point, my part with you was completed. I have shared enough things which I remembered. Now I need to move my another part.

And from now, my posts will move further with my intermediate fellows. But the good news is, some of them have been there with me after my schooling. Hope, this is the best thing for me.

See you in further pages. And you are good hear my further posts.

Nagabhushanam Nukala

Same Day - The Bad News followed by a Good News.

Dated - Feb 14, 2012

May be, this day fills some of the hearts with a joy, but for me, it’s just a "Black Day". It was the same day for me in routine, I just woke up as usual. This single heart does not seem for a special one for its (special) day. Because, I was happy for some other thing, my next step in my career is on the building stage. All the rounds were completed for the new company and I am eagerly waiting for their acceptance. The final round has also been completed.

Even though I went to the Office, my mind is spinning with the positive and negative thoughts; my eyes are searching for the reply mail from the company, my ears are waiting for their call. Later, my patience got dried as time runs on its track.

The time almost got ticked to 5 pm. I am in a hurry on the way to home. I left office before than usual.

All of a sudden, My Mobile is roaring in the pockets. The letters DAD alerted me. But he conveyed me with the bad news “Nanamma Chanipoyindhira”,(which happened around 5:30 pm). The mind has stopped working as it hit with a shock. Really it’s a bad news for me. I can’t explain here my grief. I have no words to speak. I have no air to breath.

Those two words got stuck, which are unable to escape from my mind. With the same mind, I started to my Home Town.

I got a call from my Dad today at the same time(5.30 pm), we remembered this day. How would we forget?

Later one or more days, I got a good news, “I am Selected”. But in the appointment letter, the day of acceptance was on 14th Feb, that same day. Actually, it was delayed by 2 days.

Even after changing to the new place, those memories surrounded my brain. It never left me alone, the alone bought the memories, grief and little drops from my eyes.

Hero by Night

               12 years of my schooling never carved a mark about me. Even, I didn’t make a mark too. But in the time crossways, I stood as a Hero before them. I want to compare my position with a small story. Of Course, we already heard this story in our Intermediate. But I want to narrate myself in my words.

                A small boy living in a small town, who is very fear about the dark. Every day, he sleeps beside his mother. But there is one day, where he needs to sleep alone. The author narrated well about his feelings for every second he spent in the dark. But at the end of the story, a thief entered into his house, mistakenly, our small boy caught the thief. But intentionally, he didn’t catch the thief; he was feared about the shadow behind the window. It went for peak when the thief entered into the house. When almost the thief reached his bed, he just jumps and bites him. But on the next day, he became hero as he caught the notorious criminal.

                Same as the small boy, I crowned as a Hero in front of my pals after the first get2gather. Even though, the idea was aroused from me & Suresh, the success behind the first get2gether, (Of course, everything we scheduled) has to be shared with each and every-one. Because, every one was part of them for its success. And, Of course, after that I am promising my position as stable because of only one of my attribute, i.e., my love towards them that keeps contact with them. That is helped for the later successful get2gathers.

                 And at the same time, this span of get2gathers, I am arousing newly every time and all my positives and negatives are getting listed in my mind, i.e., all about myself. But, my only question to all(Tenth mates) is "Does it creating love/care on me or to my position?". Because, every time, I am standing as a Manager(as you call) and at the same time, I am losing myself, my personal identity. I can explain in a small example, people ask me, they put a word on me, "gather our friends for my marriage". Finally, this little confusion digging in my mind from so many days...!!!!!!

                 

Success

Am I finally succeed? Are you satisfied? Same question, if someone posed to you, when you are drawing a few thousand bucks from your card monthly and spending 12 hours daily in front of a system, doing some scrap work. What is your answer or at least self check by yourself?

But I have faced both, one after the other. I didn't understand what I need to say when the same thing posed by my Big B? Its a war between a dream and its success.

Here we go.....

I remember one saying from my childhood. Now it screwing up my mind and make me sleepless from the past a few days.

"Set a Goal. Strive for Success"

At that time, I didn't ask a question what is 'Success'. If somebody asks me now, I can't tell. Because, I never dream about my goal. Now it is a time to set a goal for me. Not only for me, for every one. I am sharing you my experience that was happened a few days back.

I stayed late before the day in Office till 2 pm midnight. It is hard for me to recuperate the next day with the same energy I have the day before. I am late for the day, skipped the sun rise. Now I am in a hurry, to start to my office. Just when about to start, I had a call. He is 'Future' side of mine.

Just we spoke for nearly one and half hour. Later I self checked "what is my Goal?". Its screwing my mind after that conversation. Yes, probably, I have some set of goals either short or long but I never take it serious. Yes, I don't have a FIRE. But badly, I am a person of fate believer. If I come across the chance, I will never lose it. I try my better part of me and left the result for the Fate. But, after the conversion in the call, I need to re-arrange the setting parts of my mind.

But finally I am asking one small favor from my Big B. Yes, I have a FIRE. But it is not helping me to reach my dreams. Please spill out some oil, to catch my dreams. I need an equivalent amount that how much care(you have) on me.

Money Vs Relations

Its a long break after my busy days. Yesterday, I had find some time in watching a movie. Somewhere in my mind, the scenes got stuck and were repeating without stop button. As usual, the other face came from me, and wrote following tag.

"Dad never taught me how to make money, but only how to make relations"

I know that, I came up, not from a well rich family. As said, a middle class, where every expense of penny should have a thought before spending it. A compromised spending. But I am lucky, dad never draw us to go in a hurdle way (for money). I never feel like I need to make a money. Still, I am not interested to make a money and frankly, I don't know how to make it. I know only, how not to spend unwise.

And relations, he(dad) is good at keeping the relations. A good guider and well take carer. But still I don't know why people will involve my dad in only hard situations, not in happy situations. May be due to his attributes.  Badly, I took the inheritance from my dad, in making the relations. As his life leading, my life following the same path. I am very much interested in relations. After all, I don't understand these relationships, how will make it up stronger and its binding with the money and needs. Because, I am good at only making quick relations, not long relations, as I can't entertain the people for long. I have no words after some days.

Gone is Gone. But, I just forecast my life, simulated with 'Money' and 'Relations(real)'. How I would be in coming years?

Its blank.

I am just waiting for someone to change up my mind. Otherwise, my life is blank, no doubt.